All the dreams I had I`ll never have again
It feels impossible to have anything of my own
I wanted you to be the one who had to walk away
Since it`s over now there`s nothing left to say
Go on living a life
Faced with things I`ve tried to hide
Somewhere I`ve failed to realize
What will become of this
Your sweet misery has caused me no pain
I wanted to blame you now I am left to blame
Tomorrows are days that I`ll just waste away
It seems all wrong but I think it`s okay
Never thought I`d be alive
To see this day
A deal`s a deal now
There`s nothing left to say
I`m going on living my life
Without you by my side
All my truths turned into lies
What will become of this
As I stepped out into the world
And felt the permanence of it all
Naivety of what`s out there
Or was yet to await me
I pointed out to myself
What I was painfully aware
Of the sorrows that I had caused
By no one but me
Ridiculous thoughts
And imaginary pains
I believe that all is lost
I let time have it`s way
Living in a fantasy world
When reality slapped my face
Putting me into a tailspin
Stumbling quickly out of grace
In a state of confusion
Out of lives I humbly did bow
Left doubting dreaming dreams
No one ever dreamt before
I start out on my journey
Of not going anywhere
I see all of my horizons
Start to sink in the air
Maybe I should feel so bad now
Maybe a little worse than you
I shouldn`t have gone and done those things
But what was I supposed to do
Your eyes see across the room
Catching your eye
Can`t move
Moving towards me
I escape
Forcing me to lead the way
Sounds of voices begin to fade
Sounds I still here to this day
Turn around
Call my name
Making me feel I`m to blame
Expecting nothing
Needing more
Leave me alone I implore
Your eyes smile
I start to fade
Pray for nothing
Just wanting this to end
Going down
Falling in
Getting deeper
This is sin
No one`s looking
No one cares
All my senses are impaired
Drowning further
I can`t see you
You make-believe
That I can be you
Your hand grabs me
I can`t move
Keep on fighting
Just cut me loose
Only questions
Never lies
You took all I had left to hide
Caused me shame
Leave me to die
Wishing nothing
Wanting everything I had
I remember when the days would pass
From one morning sun to the next
All your fears would be put to rest
By hearing the laughter of another
I remember days of early cartoons
I sat and watched some yesterday
It made me think back on those times
Man I wish I was a child again
Can we turn back the time
Can we relive yesterday
Can someone hold me
I really just want to stay
I don`t know why I`m feeling this way
I just here looking at myself
I think my how time has slipped away
How much more time do I have left
I only want the same as anyone
My soul is aging with the sun
All this outer beauty soon will cease
Then a shell is what I`ll become
Can we turn back the time
Can we relive yesterday
Can someone hold me
I really just want to stay
Where`d it all go
Where has the time all gone
Why didn`t someone wake me
Have I been gone that long
I watch the sun go down in the west
I wonder if I`ll ever get to touch it
I look back and then I soon forget
That I have only just begun
I feel a need to keep this life
Try to be so sweet and innocent
It`s not as easy as it used to be
But I`m still running through my field of dreams
Hey there little girl
Yeah that`s what you are
You`re just a weak little girl
Backed into a corner
What you gonna do now
Where are ya gonna go
What`s the matter with you now
Not a friend left in the world
Keep on kicking
Keep on screaming
It could be worth your while
Or you might be dreaming
I see you`re in your corner still
You`re too afraid to move
You`re madness is setting in
And it`s taking over you
Staring off into nowhere
Looking nothing in the face
You`re such a pitiful thing
You`re nothing but a waste
Open your eyes girl
So that you can see
All of those little things
That make you so weak
Look straight into my eyes
And tell me what you see
As I start to pull off my disguise
I watch the tears roll down and stain your cheek
Look away from me now
Just like you`ve done for years
Turn around to me now
As I reveal your worst of fears
You were my savior
You were my grace
I became your Judas
I can`t look you in the face
I started going down again
Right down Memory`s Pain
Foreseeing around every bend
Knowing there`s really nothing there to gain
I stopped to see what I left behind
And I knew that I was lost again
This is not what I had in mind
Once again tragedy is my friend
Maybe I`m the one that`s wrong
If I only had one wish
You look away now
It`s your right to choose
I run towards you
Because I have everything to lose
Every regret that I have had
I remember the words you said
First I showed you life
Then I showed you death
How long can this go on
Why did it come to this
Well maybe I`m the one that`s wrong
If I only had one wish
I grow weary of your recklessness
Getting tired of your selfishness
I expect more and you`re giving less
Why can`t you do this for me
I`m yearning for your every touch
Needing more but not wanting much
All my hopes have turned to dust
Why are you doing this to me
It`s getting sadder and sadder
You`re touching me without feeling
I`m getting madder and madder
Wanting what`s not inside of me
I want to know what I have done
What has made you feel this way
Am I the only one
Will it ever be the same
My days are short my nights are long
I`m getting weak I can`t be strong
I`ve lost discernment of right and wrong
How long can I go on
It`s my heart I can not follow
It`s blood has blinded me
I only now can fret for my sorrow
I am still in disbelief
Copyright 2000 All lyrics written by Amy Carter
Except "Permanence" & "One Wish" lyrics co-written with Brian Carter